Keystone

From comments, emails and IM's, it's clear to me that the third part of what Brice is now calling The Gigagiggles Trilemma has the popular vote: The Job is Not the Point. I'll tackle that one first then, but there's some more groundwork to lay out.

The answer given to the first question in the Westminster Catechism says, "Man's chief end is to glorify God, and enjoy him forever."

That's the keystone of my whole problem. Remove it, and nothing else serves any purpose. Or if you prefer, it's all four corners of the jigsaw puzzle. Everything must fit in that frame. The solution will grow and take shape from this point.

Groundwork

First, let's name the three Or's:

"I need to do something more potentially impactful with my life than making video games." That's the Get a Real Job argument.

"I need to convince myself once and for all that video games matter in the Grand Scheme." That's the Games Matter argument.

"It's not so much what you do, but how you do it, and who you are that matters in the 'changing the world for the better' sense." That's the The Job is Not the Point argument.

Do Games Matter, or should I Get a Real Job, or is it that The Job is Not the Point?

Idealism

I need to stop watching movies like Patriot and Braveheart. They make feel like what I do is worthless.

Or, I need to do something more potentially impactful with my life than making video games.

Or, I need to convince myself once and for all that video games matter in the Grand Scheme.

Or, I need to re-convince myself that it's not so much what you do, but how you do it, and who you are that matters in the 'changing the world for the better' sense.

Those of you who know me know this is not a new struggle. In fact, those of you who know me well are probably getting tired of it. I am too. So, once and for all, I'm going to work through those three "Or's" right here, out loud. And when I get into one of these funks again later you can say, "Shut up Bill," and point at this blog and wiggle your eyebrows pointedly.

Upheaval

Well, phooey. After a few hours of wrestling with three year old html, I've decided to just wipe it and start fresh. The impetus was the deluge of spam-comments. Blogger's comment system should fix that, but it looks like if you don't have a Blogger login, you can't comment here. Can someone confirm (or, um, dis-confirm) that?

In other news, I presented what I've been working on to MGM today, and their producer's boss's boss said, "This is revolutionary."

Viva la! (That's Spanish, I believe, for 'woot!')

Know Thyself

The Myers-Briggs personality test puts me at INTP...but barely a T, so when I feel like it I can cross over into INFP territory. Those letters mean nothing to me, but the last time I took the test, the site assigned words to me like architect, philosopher, searcher and seeker. If you preface each of those with 'amateur,' I think they're a pretty good fit.

Yesterday, Katie pointed me to a personality assessment I hadn't seen before. It's called the Johari Window. You pick 5 or 6 words out of a grid of 55 that you feel most accurately describe you. Then you have friends and family pick 5 or 6 and the tool gives you a neat little map of what you think of yourself compared to what others think. Here's a link where you can fill out my window if you're so inclined then make one of your very own.