There and Not Quite Back Again

I mostly feel good. I have the occasional bout of what on earth am I doing? ...I chose not to join my former colleagues in the return to Cyan on Wednesday.

The lay off cracked open a door for me that couldn't be forced shut again. Basically, this dwarf has spent too long in Rivendel. Elves are great, Elrond's the best, but I've got dragons to slay and mountains to reclaim and I feel like I'm gettin' soft with all the dancing and good eats.

So when everyone else turned around and headed back, I hoisted my pack and kept going. Don't know what's over there, but the horizon is too tempting.

I'll try to send letters back from the front, when I find it...

Rant-free Analysis

It's very rare to find free, public, articulate analysis of the state of the game industry that isn't blatantly mixed with a large dose of the author's (usually some crusty dev or ex-dev's) own agenda.

These essays by Danc make sense and are devoid of the usual the-industry-hates-me-because-I'm-smart-AND-pretty.

In other news, the kid at million dollar homepage is up to $108,000 in under a month. I really, really wish I'd thought of it.

Progress

Well, I've managed to work on the book every day for 31 days now. I'm a little over a fifth done, which is right where I'd expected I'd be. My spreadsheet tells me I'll finish around mid-January. Would be nice to finish before the end of the year, just 'cause. It's still too early to post any excerpts I think, though I'm dying to because the stuff makes me laugh out loud, and I think you all will enjoy it.

It's fun reading the comments from people who've been playing Myst V. I can't believe some have it already. Despite Cyan's current circumstances, every sale helps all of us. It's especially rewarding to see praise for aspects in Myst V that we worked hard to improve after Uru *cough, navigation, cough*.

Morituri Nolumus Mori

"What is that on your badge, Captain Carrot?"

"Mission motto, sir," said Carrot cheerfully. "Morituri Nolumus Mori. Rincewind suggested it."

"I imagine he did," said Lord Vetinari, observing the wizard coldly. "And would you care to give us a colloquial translation, Mr. Rincewind?"

"Er..." Rincewind hesitated, but there really was no escape. "Er...roughly speaking, it means, 'We who are about to die don't want to,' sir."

"Very clearly expressed. I commend your determination..."

- Terry Pratchett, The Last Hero

Some observations here at the end of my first week of unemployment:

1. Being unemployed is a lot of work.
   
2. The intersection of the set cities with game companies and the set of cities with affordable housing is small.
   
3. I wish I'd thought of this.
   
4. Encouraging emails and comments from friends and strangers rock. Thank you.
   
5. The gym is a lot less crowded at 2:30 than it is at lunch.
   
6. No, I will not live in a shack and drive six hours a day to make your game Mr. Southern California. (Ask me again in six months.) (Make that three.)
   

Tubthumping

Well, as Ryan reported, most of us at Cyan are going to have a reeeallly long holiday weekend.

I've heard horror stories of how things like this go down at other companies, but they're being very generous here. It's obvious it breaks Rand's heart to let everyone go.

The nice thing is, there are lots of jobs out there right now. The bad thing is, there aren't a lot of interesting projects. But there are some, and everyone at Cyan is so talented, I have no doubt that everyone will land on their feet.

As for the dream that was Cyan, man, that hurts. It's not quite dead yet...there's a skeleton crew manning the ship for a little while longer, and if something works out, they want to hire back anyone who hasn't moved on.

We've had a bit longer to process this stuff than everyone else, and what I've realized is that I'm still young...and I still have the energy to try to make a difference in this industry.

So I guess I'm saying, please don't forsake the dreamers though this dream is lost. We're still out here. Dreaming. Tubthumping.